Extract

Hlaudi Motsoeneng says his new party is “going to eat change”. This makes a refreshing shift towards austerity: When he ran the SABC he ate many millions of rand, he and his cronies letting the change dribble out of their mouths and clatter down over their gravy-stained bibs onto the floor.

Not everyone, however, was laughing at Motsoeneng on Thursday afternoon, when he launched his new political party, the African Content Movement. In fact, some wondered if the media attention was ethical.

After all, if a dazed-looking megalomaniac who regularly referred to himself in the third person called a press conference to announce that he was Napoleon, would you report on it or would you try to find a doctor and notify his family? Motsoeneng, some feel, doesn’t need votes: He needs help.

I agree that Motsoeneng needs help, but not in the way they mean. SA has a very high unemployment rate, and if you have no skills and have been dragged off the ANC teat, it is almost impossible to keep yourself in shiny blue suits and pointy leather shoes. Launching a political party is an obvious entrepreneurial step. And who knows? If Bathabile Dlamini can still be a cabinet minister and Nomvula Mokonyane can be tasked with environmental affairs just as scientists explain that climate change is about to end us, who’s to say Hlaudi can’t win the 40,000-ish votes he needs for a seat in parliament and another five years living on the taxpayer’s dime? No, if you’re ambitious, possess the hypnotic charisma of Nosferatu, and are unencumbered by a conscience or a sense of shame, SA is a land of milk and honey! I’m barely joking, by the way. Ten years ago, the prospect of a wrecking ball like Motsoeneng running for president would have been the stuff of pure satire. But that was before Do...

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