“Rotational load-shedding”? Sheesh. Eskom can’t even generate a good euphemism. What’s wrong with “Scheduled Cosiness-sharing” or “Non-optional mood-lighting”? No man. Rotational load-shedding is what airliners do when they spiral into the ground.

Fortunately, there’s slightly less vagueness around what’s causing the ANC’s latest attempt to cripple the economy: Eskom and experts agree that the problem isn’t coal. We’ve got heaps of the stuff; so much, in fact, that come Christmas the government could put a lump of it in the stocking of every naughty girl or boy. At least they could burn it to warm up their pudding.

That, however, is where the consensus seems to end.

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