THIS past weekend my family marked the end of ukuzila, the mourning period for our mother, who recently lost her year-long battle with colon cancer. Her passing was the culmination of the worst 12 months of my adult life. Everything seemed to disintegrate, from my career to my relationships, and seemed to confirm what many adults have since told me: when many of life’s little losses happen in quick succession, it is usually preparation for something heavier. There has been no bigger loss than losing my mother. We lost our father over a dozen years ago and, while it was a confusing time for me, but especially for my younger brother, losing our mother has been the most debilitating. It is one no words can encapsulate.

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