Jamie Carr Columnist

The average punter’s relationship with the nation’s favourite spreadable dairy product is merely that of the consumer. You slip down to Woolworths for 500g of its rich, smooth and creamy salted butter and perhaps half a dozen crumpets; you wait for the domestic calorie control’s eyes to be averted; and, watching carefully for any hidden webcams, you toast the crumpets, dose them liberally with the good stuff and gorge until it’s running in rivers down your chin.

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