Rudy Giuliani: An ego the size of the Hindenburg. Picture: REUTERS/Jonathan Ernst
Rudy Giuliani: An ego the size of the Hindenburg. Picture: REUTERS/Jonathan Ernst

What a piece of work is Rudy Giuliani? Lawyer. Crime fighter. Time magazine person of the year 2002. Honorary knight of the British Empire. Crusading New York mayor (two terms). Inventor of the "perp walk" in which high-profile crime suspects were paraded before the media. Associate attorney-general under Ronald Reagan. Senatorial candidate. Presidential adviser and lawyer. Presidential post facto attack dog.

No surprise, then, that Giuliani, a kid from Brooklyn, has an ego the size of the Hindenburg and an inflammable sense of outrage to match.

You may have seen him give an unhinged press conference outside Four Seasons Total Landscaping in Philadelphia — a garden centre jammed between a crematorium and a sex shop — and days later at another presser where two rivers of black hair dye streaked down his cheeks.

Given his frantic schedule as he seeks to fulfil Donald Trump’s mission to have the election overturned, it was perhaps inevitable that he would get infected. After all, the message from the White House on how to protect oneself from the virus has been erratic. Why would he break ranks with his boss and wear a mask? Or not blow his nose on a handkerchief, and then wipe his face with the same side? Giuliani is now in hospital but "feeling good". Trump tweeted: "Get better soon, Rudy, we will carry on."

Carry on with what, exactly? Not combating the pandemic that may kill 450,000 Americans by the end of winter? Not asking folks to stay home as infections rocket? Not saying sorry to those fighting for their lives as the curve does anything but flatten?

As a Brooklynite might say, fuggedaboudit.

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