As the Zuma faction accuses Cyril Ramaphosa of trying to cover up the theft of a suspicious amount of cash from one of his properties, and the president insists he’s just a simple farmer selling the odd water buffalo for pennies, we as South Africans should do the responsible thing: listen to both sides, weigh up the evidence ... and then believe absolutely none of it.

Even at the best of times this scandal would stink to high heaven of factional spin and absurdly transparent hypocrisy. On the one hand we have the radical economic transformation (RET) cabal, which oversaw state capture, squealing about corruption and money-laundering. On the other we have a man who has been integral to the inner workings of the ANC for decades and yet keeps pretending to be shocked by the normal functioning of that organisation, whose son received R2m from the cultish sleaze-fest that was Bosasa, and who continues to surround himself with the same coterie of wretches that got us into this mess...

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