Faf du Plessis should walk into his first media conference in Australia wearing a towel around his waist, sucking a mint while accompanied by the tune of Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now by The [Steve] Smiths. He should joke about sandpaper, shoulders, stair, barging and sledging. He should take it to the local media pack because some of them will dearly want to take it to him. Such has been the way of things for South Africans in Australia. The mental disintegration begins early doors and carries on through reports and the crowd. Faf said it best just before the team left for their tour of Australia on Tuesday: it will be "nice and hostile … It’s a poker game also ... we expect them to try and unsettle us as team in the media. Having been at the forefront for quite a bit of it, we see it as part and parcel of playing in Australia. This time around there might be one or two more traps for the players to try and stay away from." Coaches and players do like it when the local media get s...

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